This is for Nicole… an apology

Did you ever have a bully?
I really only had one person who made me feel bullied, but this isn’t about her…
This is about me being a bully.

Growing up, I was a bully to one person – Nicole.
Nicole’s parents were friends with the parents of my best friend. So she was usually the “other friend” invited to my friend’s birthday parties.
We treated her like crap… doing 2 person activities to leave her out, and picking on her once she fell asleep. But every year of childhood, since this was all done on the sly, we were all throw together.

After a time, Nicole and I ended up in the same high school. We ended up with boyfriends who were friends, and started doing things together in a group. But we never talked about our former interactions.
High school was before I met the Lord as my savior, and I was the center of my world. I never stopped to imagine how Nicole felt then about being treated like crap in our childhood. Not an excuse – just an explanation.

Our lives diverged after high school, then started overlapping again in adulthood. On Facebook and in groups… we even ended up with common really close friends. Her sweet daughter has danced with my special needs daughter at a wedding, showing the character of inclusion her parents have instilled in her.

Today, as I commented on something Nicole wrote on Facebook, I felt the stab of unworthiness – to interact with her as if I had not wounded her. To be treated like a friend instead of an enemy.

So this is my confession and apology.

Nicole,
I am so sorry for being a selfish and horrible person, and hurting you as part of that. Thank you for showing me Jesus in your life by treating me with kindness and respect. It has been a gracious lesson to me.
Sincerely,
Heather

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